A brief history of the naked dress - and why it doesn't shock us anymore
Is it possible that a tumultuous year like the past one has made us more blasé about the little things?
In one way, yes. With so much going on in the "horrid news" department, we can easily ignore that Daily Mail article in our Facebook timeline (*judgies) stating: "Kendall Jenner resembles shaved poodle as she slays red carpet in sheer white gown".
Okay, actually I would click on that.
But it seems to me that the big hoo-hah that usually follows red carpet nakedness has greatly diminished. Perhaps the horror that was 2016 has made the Mother Grundies more open-minded when it comes to showing skin?
Exhibit one: Alessandra Ambrosio
HarpersBazaar.com notes that the Brazilian models recently walked the red carpet at the Victoria's Secret after party in a Alessandra Rich design, and it was uncannily reminiscent of Jennifer Lopez's iconic Versace 2000 Grammy Awards gown.
At the time, JLo was slut-shamed and revered in equal measures for her bold choice.
And think back to Liz Hurley's safety-pin dress that got so much attention back in the 90s.
Yet Ambrosio's similarly revealing dress barely made a blip.
Exhibit two: Chrissy Teigen
Recently new mom Chrissy Teigen had a massive wardrobe malfunction at the AMAs that had people talking about her dress. But not because the dress was too revealing, no. (And really, it was the EPITOME of revealing.)
It was only because of her vagina flash.
I mean can you remember what a massive deal Janet Jackson's Superbowl "wardrobe malfunction" was? And that was just a bit of nip.
So why have we lost interest in the nakedness of celebs?
I believe the reasons are many-fold:
- People are no longer THAT interested in old-school celebrities. They are interested in the lives of Insta-stars. Perhaps because people (erroneously) think that lifestyle is more attainable? Or perhaps it just feels more accessible?
- Being sexy doesn't necessarily mean showing lots of skin anymore - I mean, have you seen how some hipsters dress? #Seinfeldchic
I'd go as far to say that people have become much more obsessed with facial beauty, rather than "bodily perfection".
Perhaps this stems from a more diverse view when it comes to defining what a "perfect body" is. This is, of course, great. But your face's self-esteem might now start to suffer under the new regime...
- Almost nothing shocks us anymore. I mean, when you have such a wealth of info at your fingertips, and you can read or watch the real stuff people do to themselves and each other all over the world, there is very little room left for shock value.
Think about it: would you be shocked if you saw a pig with shaved legs wearing a leather swimsuit and eating a hotdog while swimming in Nkandla's firepool?
I didn't think so.