How to play
- With your partner, choose which ones you'd like to try together. If there are any you like the sound of but she doesn't, or vice versa, put them aside...for now.- Pick the fantasy you'd like to try first, then read the scenario and pass it to her to read.
- Agree when you want to try it out (some of the scenarios require advanced planning). Or simply choose one at random, forget about the clothes you might need and get down to it.
Most sexual fantasies require a certain amount of roleplay. This is the trickiest bit to get right because you effectively need to 'get into character' (and keep a straight face while you're doing it).
To improve your technique, take time to run through the scenario in your mind. Think about what you might say and how she might respond. In other words, devise a sex film script in your head before you begin.
The appealing thing about sex with strangers is the excitement of sex for sex's sake and the thrill of not knowing what you're going to get. Unfortunately, what you might get is a dose of the clap. But don't worry: this fantasy provides the thrill of an anonymous encounter – without the need for a urethral swab.
Imagine you've gone to a bar and are sitting, having a cup of coffee or a drink, when your partner walks in and asks if she can share your table.
Strike up a conversation. 'Do you come here often? What do you do with your free time? Do you have a partner or are you available?' Then let the conversation become more intimate. 'What sort of partner do you want and what sort of sex do you like?'
Then she tells you she's feeling incredibly horny and isn't wearing any panties. 'Want me to prove that to you?' she asks. You reply that you do, so she hitches up her skirt and asks whether what you see makes you hard. Then, even though you're supposed to be in a public place, she asks you to put your hand up her skirt, which you do.
From here it's up to you whether to have sex there and then on the table or sneak to the toilet for sex with your newfound friend. Best time to do this? How about just before she goes away for the weekend or you go away on business – that way you won't even have to spend the night with your 'stranger' after you've had sex.
Add to the 'stranger' illusion by changing the way you look when you meet. Wear a suit if you usually wear jeans, get her to do her hair in a different style, and change your sexual technique or try things you wouldn't normally do.
How to take it further
This fantasy requires both of you to suspend your disbelief so you think you're in a public place and have just met. But how about meeting in a real café, having the same kind of conversation and then going for sex in a local hotel or even in your car if you can find a secluded place where you won't get caught? For inspiration, think about the spontaneous way you behaved with your partner when you first met.
Introducing someone to the world of sex has tremendous erotic appeal – for men and women. And there's no reason why that glorious cherry-popping moment can't be relived.
One of you is a virgin. The other is older, more sexually experienced. The virgin has arrived home from school to find the house empty, with parents and older brother/sister out. She/he is still in school uniform when the doorbell rings and it's a friend of the brother or sister, visiting.
The virgin invites the older friend in for a coffee. Scattered around the room are cans of cooldrink, school books and a teenage magazine. The older friend starts off by being kind and polite, asking about school studies, but then picks up one of the magazines and realises that sex figures prominently in it. The teasing becomes more explicit.
'So this is the sort of homework you do, is it? What about the practical, how much of that have you done?' The can of cooldrink is spilled onto the uniform shirt. 'You'll have to take that off or it will stain and you'll get told off. Here, let me help you. And here's your chance to get a few lessons ahead?39;
Let's get this straight: this fantasy has nothing to do with having a predilection for youngsters, it's all about the allure of sexual innocence – and you can be sexually innocent at any age. The key to it working is to make sure the virgin asks lots of naïve but provocative questions.
How to take it further
Mention the word virgin and most of us think of young women. But this game can be just as much fun if you're the virgin and she's the experienced older woman. Remember how you felt when you first saw The Graduate? Nice idea, wasn't it? We rest our case.
Doctors and nurses
Most of us have played variations on this game at some time in our life – usually as curious five-year-olds. And we knew back then it was naughty, which is why it still holds a thrill now that we're adults. Here's how to put the ER into erotic.
You're a doctor and nurse in a busy hospital. One of you is in a white jacket, the other in nurse's uniform. It's been a hard night and as nurse passes the doctor's room, the doctor calls out: 'You look worn out. Got a headache?' 'Yes, doctor. I can't seem to get rid of it.'
'Well, I know a cure for that, nurse. Hop up on the couch and I'll give you a neck massage.' Nurse lies down and the doctor says: 'I'm really good at relieving tension this way, nurse. Just tell me if this feels good.' 'Oh doctor, you do have healing hands.'
As the doctor strokes the nurse's neck, one hand strays down to other parts of the body. 'You're really tense, nurse, you should have a proper massage, you know. I read in an old medical book that this can help.'
The doctor then produces a feather and/or vibrator, and gently unbuttons the nurse's uniform. The doctor then gently strokes the nurse's nipples, belly and genitals, with either feather or vibrator or both. 'Does this feel better?' 'Oh yes, doctor. But it really does feel tense here...and here...and here.'
Since the metal of a stethoscope is cold and hard you can have great fun putting it on sensitive body parts like nipples and buttocks. But if your local fancy dress shop doesn't have one, try this: get the nurse to close her eyes and use the back of a cold spoon instead.
White, green or blue jacket to stand in as 'scrubs', or a doctor's coat. A plain blouse and skirt/trousers for the nurse's uniform.
Couch, bed or table spread with towel or sheet.
How to take it further
There's a whole sexual subculture enjoyed by people who like to give each other 'thorough medical examinations'. Hire some surgical greens from a fancy dress shop, invest in surgical gloves and experiment with ever more invasive procedures.
Quickies are often thought of as the preserve of shifty office managers having affairs with their secretaries. But the sex they provide can be especially exciting if you're in a long-term relationship where spontaneous sex is just a distant memory.
You're in the kitchen or hallway, or maybe in the garden. You know friends or relatives are due to knock on the door at any moment. Or you could even be out walking in the country or at the seaside, or in a bar or art gallery. You look at your partner and know that if you don't have sex that very moment, you'll explode.
You kiss passionately and hungrily. Your hands roam over and under clothes, but you know you can't undress – someone might surprise you at any moment. And anyway, you're in far too much of a hurry.
You push your partner up against a convenient wall or seat and undo zips and buttons and pull clothes up, down and aside just enough to allow penetration. With one eye peeled to make sure you won't be caught out, you have fast and furious sex.
A good position for quickie sex is to have her standing with one foot resting on a chair (or similar object) and to enter her from behind, leaving your hands free to unbutton her blouse and play with her breasts.
How to take it further
To really enjoy a quickie you need to get the adrenaline rush that only the risk of getting caught provides. Doing it 10 minutes before her mother arrives for Sunday lunch should do the trick. Or try doing it by your bedroom window in broad daylight (but don't quote us if a passing policeman wants a word).
There are thought to be over 500 different sexual positions, yet most of us feel we're high achievers if we go beyond missionary, doggy and her on top. The positions we use most might be the ones we feel most comfortable with, but a little variety can turn a great sex life into a really great sex life.
You are sexual athletes, performing for your country in the World Sex Olympics. The more unusual the sexual position you attempt, the higher the points. But you will also be awarded points for style and content, and for sexual satisfaction, so you need to find a new position that works for both of you.
Talk over the sexual positions you have used before – you may have tried woman-on-top, doggy-style, standing up or you may not have ventured past man-on-top. Anything you've done so far is off limits on the grounds that it will be far too boring to earn points.
Think about sexual positions you've heard about or seen in porn movies – standing, sitting, the 'scissors' and 69. You're about to start an hour-long training session, so get to it. Remember: the more positions you try, the more points you earn.
You can add some extra fun to your Sexual Olympics by dressing up for sex rather than dressing down. Seeing you in your rugby apparel may well be a big turn-on for her, although we don't recommend the All Black's kit. And there aren't many women who don't look good in a netball outfit.
How to take it further
You can add an element of chance into the game by writing down two sets of words on small pieces of paper. On one set write body parts and on the other write action words like 'kiss', 'nibble', 'suck' etc. Be as explicit as you like but agree the choice of words together.
Fold up the pieces of paper and put them into two separate bowls. Then draw out one suggestion from each bowl so you end up with combinations like 'lick' + 'nipples' and so on. Make draws as often as you like – before and during a new position.
So what are your fantasies? Share them in our comment box below.