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Getting kinky

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If lovemaking is about the soft caress of body-to-body or spirit-to-spirit, then kinky sex is about one lascivious mind meeting up with an equally decadent one.

Now rough, tough sex can take place with different kinds of recipients, from your long-term relationship partner when you want to spice things up a bit to the one-night stand you don't plan on bringing home to mamma. If it's with your soulmate it's simpler because you can share fantasies. If you discover one that makes you both shout "bingo", then go ahead and collect your prize.

Position and power
Those who enjoy kinky sex would do well to adopt the golden law of property magnates: position, position, position. Some positions create greater excitement than others (personal preference rules here), plus if you want it really hot you'll have to remember all three P's: Position, Power and Props. Kinky sex is about playing with power to get each other worked up, breathless and downright dirty.

A friend of mine who enjoys some light bondage explains that she likes restraining her boyfriend – she handcuffs his wrists above his head and ties his ankles to the bottom of the bed so she becomes the more physically powerful one who then takes the lead. After that she strips for him until she's wearing only a see-through lacy bra, a black G-string and high-heeled boots and then up she climbs, astride him – to test how much he can endure. You can also play with power by adopting different positions which make you feel more submissive or dominant.

Using props
Try blindfolds or handcuffs, or even gags for the rougher stuff. Words also function effectively as props. Create kinky love scenes by telling your partner who they are playing and who you are, and what you plan to do about it. Tell her what she looks like, in reality or just make it up, and remember, the more details the sexier it is.

Keep in mind
Kinky sex doesn't mean you have to treat your partner badly. It all comes down to communication. Letting each other know what would really turn you on...

Are you a kinky kitten? Share your raunchy tips in the comment box below.

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