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When I asked my partner in crime to test this position so that I can write about it, our conversation went along the following lines:
“You want me to do WHAT?”
“Brace yourself like a table so that I can hang off you like a monkey or a sloth while we’re having sex.”
“I heard you the first time. What I meant was, what, in all of our time together makes you think that that would work? Or be any fun? Or not break my penis?”
“Erm…”
“ We both like my penis, remember?”
“Touché.”
And that was the end of that.
So I’m giving you this position without having tried it myself. I would really appreciate it if those of you who have tried it will comment in the box below and give myself and the other readers some tips. Because as far as I can see, orgasming in this position seems… unlikely, while disaster or “mehness” seems very likely.
How you do it:
He stands on his hands and knees and you wrap your arms and legs around him so that you’re hanging like a sloth off a branch. He penetrates you – I’m guessing with some difficulty – and then you move. (How you actually move is unclear.)
It is important that he keeps his shoulders and knees at right angles to the floor to prevent joint discomfort.
Okay, I know this wasn’t very helpful – but can we look at it as an experiment? Next week I’ll give you something that I have actually tried. Promise.
Women24 will not be held responsible for any slipped disks, broken penile chambers or any other damage to the genitals and/ or backs resulting from this position.
Is this a position for you?
