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This Ramadan I plan to better myself

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My intention for Ramadan is to accept what is in my heart and soul, rather than be on the edge of my emotions. I refuse to allow feelings and negatives to trick me into myopia and forgetfulness.

I am the Almighty’s creation! I want this month to imprint something on me and in my life which has been missing. 

During this month, every sinner makes an intention to emerge a better person. I begin with sacrifice, to worship, to take my heart and engulf it in the blessings which this month holds for us, to lay my soul bare, so that it will be cleansed.

I have a feeling of euphoria about this sacred time, being able to try again for the 43rd time. Who knows if I will see the 44th?

I want change to happen from within. I want to look outward without my vision of life altered with an omnipresent layer of dirt, shift the grime and help my heart and soul flourish.

I see how people treat each other, how materialistic the world has become. How people hurt each other for the love of money and status.

Assisting a person comes with conditions. Most of us are wandering around lost, searching for peace and happiness yet we lack compassion and empathy. The thing which stands between us and that search is our Ego. 

I need to conquer my ego, I need to realise that I have made errors and bad judgement calls. I need to start from the bottom and shed the ton of unnecessary baggage weighing me down.

I need to take responsibility for everything that has gone wrong. Holding myself, and my decisions/choices accountable for everything that has happened.

We can’t change the course of events. Everything is written out for us, but earnest prayer can change our circumstances.

We all suffer through various challenges, we rejoice at the blessings we received, we learn to have a grateful heart when we go through testing times, we learn humility when we meet those who have nothing. 

Our Creator doesn’t give us more than we can bear. We see his endless mercy if we learn to look close enough, even in the most trying of times.

Though it won't be easy, I pray that I will:

- Learn to accept the things I cannot change and not allow them to make me bitter or resentful. 

- Find the good in everything, no matter how hard it may seem.

- Live my life in a state of gratitude instead of shame or guilt, for the blessings the Almighty has bestowed on me.

We as humans have been given amazing bounties in life, and we forget the true source of these bounties. This is the time when one remembers who actually made this all possible, with gratitude and humility. Fasting instills in us consciousness of the Almighty. 

The month of Ramadan is about purifying the soul, teaching discipline, feeding the hungry, and communing with God. It’s about abstaining from bad habits, whether they be profanity or gossip. 

It’s not just about one's stomach, its every part of your body. Everything in one has to fast. Though you are starving your body, you are feeding your soul.

For me, I want this month to revive and resuscitate me, and the first step is to be honest with myself, and at the end of this I will rise like a phoenix from the ashes.

Check out Saffiya's blog and follow her on Twitter.

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