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Anyone who has had to change salons after spending five years with their hairstylist knows the trepidation and pain that comes with breaking up with your stylist. It could be ranked up there with breaking up with a boyfriend. It’s that deep!
So there I was typing and deleting the message I wanted to send to my hairstylist recently. Old cliches flooded my mind. “It is not you, it is me.” “I just need a little break from this relationship.” Another favourite: “You and me are in a rut and it may do us both some good to explore seeing other people.”
After a little anxiety, in the end I chose honesty.
I said:
For me, the fact that I was going back to my old salon made the break-up easier. In essence, this hairstylist “stole” me from the one I have just gone back to. Telling her that I was returning to my “first hairstylist love” was easy.
After my rambling message to make her feel better for taking business from her, her response was that she understood.
I breathed a sigh of relief. Later, I was free to post pictures of my new crown. I respect my hairstylist too much to just announce my new hair on Instagram.
READ: Artist Laetitia Ky conveys her message with hair
It’s akin to letting her read all about our break up on social media, the way some DJ was purported to have dumped a famous TV presenter via WhatsApp years ago.
READ: Redefining images around black hair
The relationship between us and our hairstylists is deep, even spiritual. For some people, not just anyone can touch their hair, as their ancestors simply will not allow it.
From infancy, our hair is taken care of by our moms, or someone trusted in the neighbourhood. There are a lot of superstitions attached to anyone touching our hair. Various societies on the continent have rituals with hair cutting for such milestones as births and deaths.
READ: Black hair. My Hair. The politics of black hair in SA continues
The biblical Samson teaches us the importance of hair to our own weaknesses and strengths as a people.
You trust her or him to do any style you want, often copied from runways or social media posts.
More importantly, you need a reliable person who will fix your hair when that coveted hairstyle does not come out looking like the one in that photo shoot.
You know what they say about trusting anyone near your head with a braiding needle or pair of scissors. They can make or break your look.
