Share

3 things you can learn from second time round-brides

accreditation

I’ve often thought that the best people to help you plan your wedding, are those who’ve gone through the wedding planning process before.

So who better to ask than those who’ve not just gotten married once, but twice. Second time brides have the luxury to weigh up what didn’t work at their first wedding, and are able to rectify it for their second.

Here’s a handy go-to guide about the top lessons you can learn from second time brides:

You’ll probably get cold feet at some point during the planning process

I was reading an interesting article on Offbeat bride where a bride who has had a second wedding, talks about the difference between feeling dread or cold feet. The one is normal and often has a lot to do with you simply being stressed out or under pressure because you want everything to be perfect.

The one thing she says you should keep in mind, is that you should always listen to your gut. If you and your partner are open and communicative throughout everything and are each other’s support base, your nerves will all prove to be unfounded.

If, however, you’re feeling the kind of fear that refuses to go away, one that doesn’t just have you second-guessing your wedding, but also your entire relationship, you should sit down and think long and hard about why you’re having those feelings.

Don’t get married just because you’re planning a wedding, or for the sake of others. If you jump in for the long haul, make sure it’s because you want to and because you wholeheartedly love your partner.

READ MORE: 4 signs you should call off your wedding

Not everyone is going to like the direction your wedding is going in

It’s inevitable that some of the ideas you have for your wedding may rub people up the wrong way. It may be that you want a pagan-inspired wedding and your ultra conservative family are balking at the very idea or your friends aren’t feeling the rustic vibe you want to go with. So yes, there will always be someone who thinks they know your wants and ideas better than you do.

Here’s the thing though – you want this to be your only wedding, so it’s up to you to put your foot down and tell others to butt out. While compromise is important in many instances, the vision and ideas that you and your partner have for your big day are core things that reflect your creative desires and should ultimately be the core of your big day.

Anyone who refuses to understand that, should probably not be part of your wedding party.     

You might not like your wedding day but you will love your marriage (and - we’re so sorry-  but the opposite is true too)

I really don’t want to be the wedding Grinch, but not everyone will have the perfect wedding day. Things that can go wrong, often does go wrong: from vendors that fail to pitch to catering disasters, the only thing you really can control is how you choose to spend the day celebrating your loved ones.

Unless you get your period and stain your dress, in which case it’s TOTALLY okay to flip tables.

What’s more important is that a disastrous wedding does not set the tone for your marriage. It’s much better to rather have a wedding day that isn’t perfect but a marriage that is, than have the illusion of the ultimate big day, only to discover that you married the wrong person.

Besides, a strong relationship and a healthy sense of humour and (mostly) calm acceptance can go a long way to rescuing a wedding-day-gone wrong. And that’s much better than being unable to fix something that breaks after you’ve signed your wedding contract, right?

What’s the biggest lesson you’ve learnt while you were planning your wedding? Share your stories with us and we’ll feature it in a future article on W24.

READ MORE:

Answers to your biggest wedding dilemmas

4 things every bride-to-be should never have to do (unless she wants to)


We live in a world where facts and fiction get blurred
Who we choose to trust can have a profound impact on our lives. Join thousands of devoted South Africans who look to News24 to bring them news they can trust every day. As we celebrate 25 years, become a News24 subscriber as we strive to keep you informed, inspired and empowered.
Join News24 today
heading
description
username
Show Comments ()
Editorial feedback and complaints

Contact the public editor with feedback for our journalists, complaints, queries or suggestions about articles on News24.

LEARN MORE