Question:

He’s gay but has a wife

I’m 36 and in love with a 27-year-old gay man. I’ve always thought he cared for me because he told me he doesn’t want me to have someone else in my life, but I recently found out he’s married. Now that I know he has a wife I’m wondering if he’s just playing me.

He told me his wife knows about our relationship but I feel bad because I’m destroying their marriage. I don’t want to be the cause of their marital problems but I love him and I don’t know what to do.

 

 Answer:

When you started a relationship with this man you didn’t know he was married. Now that you do know, do you think it’s a good idea to continue with the relationship? It seems you’ll be setting yourself up for disappointment. You’re justified in wondering if he’s not just playing around and simply wants to have his cake and eat it too.

Think about yourself and what you want in life. What if he’s not telling you the truth about his wife and she doesn’t actually know about you? What then? This is a man who wasn’t honest with you about being married in the first place. Think about that and make a decision.

PairedLife, suggests that it is important to always remember that when dating a married man his family will always come first. This is why you should never “sacrifice everything” such as your time and independence.