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How do I tell my partner that I’m not sexually attracted to him?

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(PHOTO: Getty/Gallo Images)
(PHOTO: Getty/Gallo Images)

I just don’t like sex

Question

I’ve had a few different boyfriends and they were all really nice guys whom I had fun with, but we always had the same problem. I don’t enjoy sex at all, and it ends up destroying my relationships. I really loved the last guy I was with and I thought it would be different and that I would enjoy sex. But it was the same story, so I guess there’s a problem with me. What can I do? I don’t want all my relationships to end because of this.

Answer

There might be a medical reason why you’re having difficulty enjoying sex and that’s what needs to be determined and explored before anything else. You need to know if it’s physiological before looking at possible psychological reasons. The only way you can really find out what’s happening with you is to have a physical examination.

There might be something in your body that’s causing this and seeing a physician, or a gynaecologist might give you answers. If your physiological health is good, then consider talking to a professional such as a counsellor or a sex therapist. There might be some deep-rooted issues that surface from time to time that are contributing towards what you seem to be experiencing. Don’t despair – go get professional help.

Health suggests that “a lack of sexual attraction might be more psychological or physical.” You should first find out what is bothering you when it comes to sex and then deal with that before trying to engage with your partner. Seeking for medical help also helps when you’re stuck in such a predicament.

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