No, this is not an anti-Valentine's Day rant that might end with "just focus on yourself, queen." If anything, it's pro the biggest marketing scam of all time.
Because I think it's time we let go of the notions that a solo V-Day date is a consolation prize or love that isn't romantic is lesser and therefore not worthy of celebration on 14 February.
So by all means, gather your coins, gather your girls or even your significant others and indulge in all things pretty. Just kidding - just grab the one and only partner you have if you're not single, please.
14 February is unfortunately not a public holiday, otherwise some of us would literally use the day to take multiple afternoon naps. It's a working day, which means besides cute office deliveries, the festivities will only commence after 5pm.
So here's how we recommend you enjoy the evening whether you're single, friendshipping or relationshipping:
Single, but not mingling
For the girl who's her own best friend...
Some people will just be enjoying Thursday evening the same way they would every other evening after work - self care, series, and sipping.
Unwind while wearing this Grace satin PJ set from Poetry, R799
Make sure your series-binging eyes remain puff-free with these ULTRAVINE™ Advance – Contouring Retinol eye pads.
R227 for a pack of three pairs. Available online from TheraVine.
Finally, sip on some bubbly. We rate Krone's Brut Rose or Night Nectar will complement those cupcakes well.
Pleasant platonic evening
For friends who will be showing each other some love...
There's actually no better day for a girls' night than V-day actually because celebrating your friendships is just as important as celebrating your romantic relationships.
Bernini cocktails should make for an ideal sweet beverage to oil your gears for good conversation.
One of the best things about meeting up with your mates is that "what are you going to wear" conversation in the WhatsApp group. The correct answer to that would be this navy wrap-front maxi dress by Missguided from Superbalist, R899
That's if your Valentine's Day celebration is taking place over the weekend to allow for delivery.
Alternatively, you can shop this polka-dot Zara dress because it's still about the legs.
With a finishing touch of Smashbox Cover Shot eyeshadow, R690 at Woolworths
Loved and lavish
For the lovers...
Sometimes the person you're dating is your best friend. Here are a few things to up the ante on your romantic evening.
ROMAVINE™ massage candles, available for R238 on www.theravine.co.za
Premium bubbly is a given for couples on these kinds of occasions, so enjoy a Moët moment with your partner.
Want to smell as good as the flowers you got delivered to your desk in the afternoon?
Well then Jo Malone's Red Roses cologne is for you. Available at your nearest Jo Malone boutique.
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