I hate shopping for bras.

I mean I hate clothes shopping in general but heading to the mall to purchase a new bra is a special kind of hell that is, unfortunately, necessary from time to time.

I think a lot of the trauma around shopping for boob jailers stems from the fact that I’ve struggled from a very young age to find a bra that fits me.

READ MORE: Fashion’s twisted relationship with boobs – where do nipples stand now?

I developed breasts relatively early and my mammary growth spurt became so rapid that I ended up undergoing breast reduction during my high school years.

Because of family genetics, not only did I have cantaloupes for boobs when they should have been apples but my mother had undergone the same surgery long before she nudged me into doing the same.

So you can imagine a young girl on the verge of her early teen years being forced to fit bra after bra and never being able to find the right one.

Either there was too little support or the fit around my back was too tight and left too little breathing room, and well, it’s pretty much a recipe that’s guaranteed to make anyone hate setting foot into the lingerie section of any clothing retailer.

And when I could actually find a bra that at least offered me one of the two things, guess what colour and texture it was?

Beige with the kind of cloth wrapping that could just as well be second cousin to those medieval breastbands women used to wear a few centuries ago.

READ MORE: #SaggyBoobsMatter movement is changing women’s attitudes – and we love it!

Fast forward a few years and you’d think that after undergoing surgery, things would be a little better.

Except, it’s not quite as easy as I thought it would be.

Now that my breasts are smaller, all of a sudden I’ve been seeing nothing but padded bras everywhere.

Excuse me, but I didn’t undergo this procedure only for society to tell me that the only way my cleavage would even be remotely considered attractive is in a stuffed or push up bra.

Not that I have any issues with people who want to wear them, especially if they feel it gives them more body confidence.

I firmly believe that lingerie is such a huge confidence booster.

Of course not everyone will always see what’s underneath but that's not the point.

The fact of the matter is how it makes you feel when you’re wearing them.

I do have a problem with the fact that women are made to feel that whether they have big boobs or small boobs, it’s kind of never enough. But, that’s another column for another day.

READ MORE: Have your boobs found 'the one'?

Either way, to me it feels like most of the bras (well, the pretty bras to be specific) are designed to give your breasts that extra and perky little lift.

What if all you're looking for is a little support?

And I’ve noticed that the bigger the bra size the duller the colour palette. It's like there’s a bit of ageism here because it assumes that older women are too practically minded to feel sexy and wear more playful colours in lacier, racier, intricate designs.

Look, I don’t have a problem with nudes. In fact, I own one or two utility bras in these shades that serve their purpose as well as any other bra).

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Why not make a fair mix of pretty and lacy bras across the board along with the more conservative utility ones though?

The fact that bras out there only seem to speak to one group says to me that the only kind of women (or those identifying as women) they want to feel sexy are those that conform to society’s definition of youth and beauty.

What are your bra shopping experiences like? Do you find the bra you really want easily? Or is it an eternal struggle that frustrates you? We’d love to hear from you.


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