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10 things you're too scared to ask a quadriplegic

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How did you become paralysed?

This is probably the question I am asked most frequently. People always want to know what happened. They want all the gory details. The short version is that I was involved in a car accident almost 16 years ago at the age of 28.

I took off my seat belt while my husband was driving and climbed over into the backseat of the car to change my baby's nappy. Moments later the car in front of us came to a sudden halt causing a chain of events which led to our vehicle landing up on its roof. I hit my head on the roof of the car as it overturned, breaking my neck and injuring my spinal cord at the 4th cervical vertebrae.

At the time of the accident, I was a young, active, independent woman, wife and mother. I had a successful teaching career and was a talented sportswoman. I was happily married, had a beautiful baby boy (10 months old) and filled with the joys of life as I made plans with my husband, our friends and family to live out our dreams.

Not only did I lose the use of my arms and legs, my privacy, my independence, my career but I also lost my home, my husband (we were divorced a year later) and most tragically, custody of my son. This was given to my ex-husband. My entire world fell apart.

So you can't move your body at all. Can you move your head?

Yes. I can move my head from side to side and up and down. I can shrug my shoulders upwards, but need to rely on gravity to bring them down again.

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