Publications
Partners
- Dr Viviana Coles, an intimacy expert from Houston Relationship Therapy, reveals mood killers in bed.
- Bad breath, body odours, and dirty nails are a no-no!
- Do not underestimate the power of foreplay, just initiating sex is not enough.
A moment of intimacy can be ruined all because people ignore bedroom etiquette. These rules should be obvious but, unfortunately, aren't for everyone.
Dr Viviana Coles, an intimacy expert from Houston Relationship Therapy, reveals mood killers in bed.
Not being vocal enough. This may mean you aren't telling your partner what you like or don't like. It is already a vulnerable time, so it is essential to share, at least make a noise. Say or do something because silence can make things awkward.
Talking about past relationships: Sometimes people can try to explain why they like something, almost like justifying, and in doing so, they end up sharing too much, where they learned it from or liked it from. This may kill the mood instantly.
Hygiene: Bad breath, body odours, and dirty nails are a no-no! Things like that can turn the mood off.
READ MORE | Sexual fantasies: Try them but, there has to be mutual respect and consent
Lack of self-confidence: This may be equated with insecurity and not knowing your own body. How will your partner be confident to be intimate with you when you aren't with your own body?
Not playing enough: Do not underestimate the power of foreplay, just initiating sex is not enough. If you can, she says 20 minutes of foreplay would be great and of course, more variety in how you play.
In a previous article about etiquette during sex, intimacy coach Kgomotso Masela shared an sex guide.
Etiquette during sex:
1. Follow your partner's lead - Don't rush to 'show off' your skill. Allow your partner to lead, and you will follow after. Pay attention to the unspoken words, the movements of the body and the moans that follow.
2. Don't fake it – The more genuine you are, the better the chances of having a pleasurable experience.
3. Take it slow - Don't rush to finish. Sex is not a race, nor is it a competition. Take it slow while enjoying the journey and reaching the destination together.
4. Consent - Don't go to places that make your partner uncomfortable.
