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When looking for a partner, we usually have a long list of qualities that we would love them to possess to fit into the image of a great partner for us. That list usually includes qualities such as being loving, caring, financially stable, emotionally present and all other things that make up a good partner. However, we forget to add that they should also come from a good family. Now, I know you might be thinking, why does it matter if my partner is from a good family or not if they are a good person and a match?
Well, when two people come together to become one, more than one person gets affected.
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Of course, the term "good family" can mean different things for different people. It could mean the way they handle conflict, the way they communicate with each other, how they treat each other on a daily basis, and how they come through in times of need. However, when you get married, not only are you marrying your partner but their family too.
This means that whatever responsibilities your partner has for their family automatically become yours - their way of life becomes your way of life. Furthermore, if your partner doesn't know how to stand up to their family and hold them accountable, you get a piece of that nasty pie, too, and that one mean aunt becomes your nightmare.
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Sure, marrying someone from a good family doesn't automatically mean you will have a good marriage or one that succeeds, but it will definitely have an impact on your marriage. So many marriages have been broken because of horrible in-laws who had an influence on one partner, leading them to separate.
Although some couples are able to not get influenced by their families and establish their own life and identity, their children still deal with the consequences of having those terrible family members. When choosing a partner, consider your future children and what they will endure long after you're gone. Make it a selfish decision, yes, but also consider the generations who will come after you.
Otherwise, your children will grow up to become adults who dread going to family gatherings and possibly lose interest in being family-oriented. You may be able to cope with having bad family members, but your children may not, and they will have to deal with that family forever.
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