Shacking up

You've done it. You're taking the plunge. Her bags are packed and she's on her way in. According to a study at Newcastle University in the UK, men tend to get healthier when they start living with their partners – they start eating lighter, healthier meals and increase their intake of fruit and vegetables. Sold. But, along with a diminishing waistline, you'll need to take precautionary measures to prevent a decline in the romance department. Once you're sharing living quarters, your relationship could turn pear-shaped. Here's how to maintain your own space while simultaneously sharing it – and avoid driving each other crazy in the process.

Bedside manner
Living together is all about balancing compromise with your identity. Or is it about building a shared dream? "This is my house" no longer has a place in your repertoire. From now on the space – if not the title deed – belongs to you both. Now you need to learn to share it. Above all, communicate and don't be scared to practise the art of diplomacy when the need arises. Accept that you might have to adjust your living style, your sleeping habits and the size of your wardrobe. She may love Art Deco, while you're a confirmed minimalist. Accept it. Make a compromise. Find a solution. Move on – so that she doesn't move out.

Keep it tidy – to a point
If beer dominates your fridge, your jocks live on the floor and there's mildew on the bathroom tiles, now's the time to turn your bachelor pad into a love nest. It's always a nice gesture to spring clean before she arrives. This will give you the opportunity to get rid of old clothes, unused sporting gear and hoarded junk, freeing up space in your wardrobe for the belongings of your new housemate. Plus, plenty of needy charities would kill for your cast-offs. "Never underestimate the impact of disorganisation on your life," says Vivienne Wootton, owner of All Organised, a company that aims to streamline day-to-day business operations – and the lives of individuals. Piles of clutter, clothing and papers are a health hazard and will leave you feeling blue. You'll be lethargic and forgetful – and too ashamed to ask anybody around, so negatively impacting your social life. Cutting through this crowded confusion will save you time and money while increasing your productivity and decreasing your stress levels. After all, wasted hours spent hunting for lost items means there's less time for achieving your goals, playing golf – and being with your girl. "High stress levels affect relationships," warns Wootton. It makes sense.

If a woman is living with a disorganised partner, she's bound to feel unloved, unconsidered and out of control – which doesn't bode well for your relationship's long-term prognosis. In intimate relationships, it's disorganisation and money that trigger the most arguments, says Wootton. You don't have to be fantastically neat. You just need to create calm from the chaos. Remember, if you're working according to someone else's system, you're not going to stay organised. Both you and your partner need to decide what works for you – and stick with it.

Don't put undue pressure on yourself or create unrealistic standards and expectations that you won't be able to maintain. Sometimes getting organised is as simple as following the axiom, "Don't put it down, put it away."

From bed to worse
Pay attention to the finer details, starting with your bed. It may be a double, but is it really big enough for two? The mattress: firm and supportive, or soft and springy? New linen will work wonders for your relationship – and it doesn't have to be silk, cotton is fine. Bright and bold, or muted and sophisticated?

You'll score extra points for consulting your partner about her preferred colour scheme. Don't forget about duvets and pillows. Synthetic fibres or goose down? She may harbour an allergy you don't know about.

Her décor demands
Without fail, lose the TV in the bedroom. It's the quickest way to turn the sizzle into fizzle before you can say "Masters Championship" and doesn't make for a restful night's sleep. For the sake of your relationship, your bedroom is best reserved for sleep and sex – consider anything else an interruption. She'll love the idea of an armchair in the room for draping her clothes – and she'll love you more for making the suggestion. Be prepared: odds are she'll want a full-length mirror in a naturally well-lit part of the room. Don't baulk at this – it could benefit you, too.

Of course every woman would love a walk-in closet. If you don't have one, you'll need to structure your routine – or you'll be bashing heads in the morning as you clamber for your clothes.

Bathroom basics
Shuddering at the thought of a cluttered, untidy bathroom full of her cosmetics, grooming products and hair-styling mechanisms? While nothing makes for a happy relationship like an en-suite bathroom with "his" and "hers" basins and respective cupboard space, we can't all afford this luxury. The solution? Encourage her to invest in some rectangular woven baskets (available from all leading homeware stores). She can stack the baskets on the bathroom counters (or better yet, inside the cupboards). They'll keep her stuff neatly ordered – and if you're worried about your pad turning into pink-and-floral central, they look sufficiently masculine, too.

Out of sight, out of mind
Initially you're going to be confronted with a number of relationship – and storage – dilemmas. We've explored some quick-fix solutions for when you think you've run out of space...

Scenario 1: You're learning first-hand how easily clutter can accumulate. You're out of space on the bookshelf, but her dust-collecting women's mags and treasured journals need storing.
The solution: An aged suitcase or chest strategically placed at the foot of your bed (or under it) will keep her clutter out of sight and will imbue your bedroom with an air of well-travelled style.

Scenario 2: You're both sentimentalists. She refuses to part with her teddy-bear collection and you can't say goodbye to your rusty electric-train set.
The solution: A jumbo-sized leather storage box will stash your memorabilia with ease – and look stylish doing so. Perhaps you can put them above the cupboards in your bedroom. Or, better yet, buy two and use as bedside tables adorned with lamps. Most come with lids, to keep your belongings dust-free, and handles, to make them easier to manoeuvre.

Scenario 3: Yours is a tiny loft apartment and the interior designers weren't exactly generous in their allocation of cupboard space. You're dreading the addition of her extensive wardrobe (and her shoe collection, which puts Imelda's to shame). You're anxious that you'll have less space for your gear.
The solution: Rectangular baskets are perfect for storing your winter wardrobe in summer and your summer wardrobe in winter (although there aren't many of us who are that organised). They can be put under your bed, guilt-free. This way, you'll free up space for her clothes and shoes and ensure a seasonal clear-out – essential when living together in confined quarters. Otherwise, for at-a-glance convenience, hang a canvas shoe-holder behind your bedroom door, or on the inside of a cupboard door. Reinforced canvas jersey organisers are now also available.

Scenario 4: Until now you've happily been going about your business with an old plastic bin for a washing basket. Now she's hinted she'd like to see your dirty clothes in something more stylish.
The solution: Even when filled to the brim with your sweaty sports gear, a round rush basket in a neutral colour will look great in the corner of your bedroom – or use it to store rolled-up towels if you're lacking in cupboard space.

Scenario 5: She's threatened that your tangled collection of belts and ties might just find its way into the bin if you don't get organised.
The solution: Tie and belt organisers are the way to go. They come complete with a hook for hanging in your cupboard and easy access, but they'll hold a large number of each – and see you dressing smarter each morning.