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When Karma comes back to haunt you
I actually feel so guilty just typing it out ! I can be really dramatic and so convincing too!
The one that sticks out the most in my mind, is the day I feigned a terrible backache, the pain was severe, but was manageable enough to don on my heels and Sunday best to go to a distant relative's wedding. I ranted, moaned and groaned just to get out of it.
Eventually the family saw that I was in "excruciating pain" and left me alone at home to recover. What an evening, just me and the good old novel!
The ironic part is that I got admitted the following month to hospital to have a disc excision operation! So, there you have it, there was some truth in the story after all... you can imagine the books that flowed in while I had my 2 month post op recovery in bed !!
Simla
Blame it on the geyser
I told them that our geyser has burst and there was water absolutely everywhere. I said the dogs were running mad, in and out and our place is a mud pool at the moment.
Not a very nice excuse to use, seeing that it could really happen, but it worked like a treat. I had a wonderful day resting at home with my book and yummie chocolate.
Natasha
Oh how my stomach aches!
Recently I laid the groundwork to get a full Sunday all to myself to enjoy my latest book. On Saturday night I started complaining of stomach ache and feeling nauseous, during the night I woke my partner up and told him how sick I had been whilst he was sleeping.
I had a hot water bottle under my pillow to fake a fever and some water next to the bed to fake the cold clammy hands bit.
By the morning I looked pale and was doubled up with stomach cramps – told the family to go on to our friends for lunch and I would be fine on my own – just needed some sleep. Half an hour after they were out the door I had my snacks, glass of wine and book and camped out on the patio. Needless to say when they finally got home that night I looked much better.
Lynn
Someone's got to feed the pigs
I'm a pig farmer's wife and although I do haul swill and muck about amongst the piggies regularly, I certainly don't NEED to 'feed the pigs' anymore (I used to have to do this on weekends when the operation was a smaller scale one).
None-the-less folk will often hear me say "Oh sorry I can't be there, I'll have to be home – someone has to feed the pigs." (Obviously it won't be me but SOMEONE will have to do it!) Gosh, raising pigs ... who would have thought they'd be so terribly handy now that I don't actually have to feed them?
Lee-Ann
Like a ton of bricks
I'll never forget – I was in college reading Griet Skryf 'n Sprokie of Marita van der Vyver. Anyway, I was supposed to go out with my boyfriend that evening to a social event at his university that had been planned for over a month. But alas, I was enthralled with the book and could not put it down.
Around 6 (he was supposed to pick me up at 7) I phoned him and told him that I had been looking for something in a box in the top of my cupboard when the box fell from the top straight onto my face and as a result I know had a blue and bruised cheek.
He was so worried he offered to come over, to which I obviously gave a hasty no no reply and told him to go and enjoy himself. I spent the whole night reading and finished the book, after which I felt like I had lost a friend! The next morning the severity of my lie hit me like a ton of bricks. Luckily he wasn't a very "clever" guy and I faked a sore cheek with expert make up application for a week and a half, gradually going lighter and lighter. My friends used to want to wet their pants with laughter every time he told them how worried he had been and used to point at my cheek saying: “Shame, look at it! It must have been quite a heavy box”.
I have since then learned to use excuses that did not include any physical part!
Cindy
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