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Partners
- In this episode of Consexual, Nthabi Nhlapo speaks to Dr
Marlene Wasserman (Dr Eve), a trained sexologist and sexual medicine therapist,
about postpartum sex.
- Dr eve says this period should be discussed with consideration for the period before and during pregnancy as it greatly affects the physical and mental responses to intimacy.
- She also advises that despite the temptation to focus only on the baby when it arrives, it is essential to continue to view yourself as a lover and be intimate, even if it is impossible to include vaginal penetration at that specific point.
The postpartum period, sometimes called 'the fourth
trimester', is the weeks after a woman gives birth. By some guidelines, it is
six months, while others say it can take up to a year. Postpartum sex means sex
that you have during this time. Becoming a parent is not easy, considering the
lingering pain from delivery, raging hormones, postpartum depression, body
changes, and the pure exhaustion of having a newborn. Hence keeping a healthy
sex life after having a baby can seem inconvenient and move lower on your list
of priorities.
While many women can attest to the challenging adjustment after such a significant life change, others say they enjoy sex more after giving birth than before they were parents.
Dr Eve speaks about how long after giving birth you can have sex, what it will feel like and what body changes to expect and more.
She says addressing the postpartum period requires a thorough understanding of the entire journey before the baby is conceived, including falling pregnant, which can be challenging for most couples.
"There's a lot of pressure from their community, the culture, to be able to fall pregnant, and this immediately means whatever fun sex was happening changes because now you've got to have sex on demand. What was fun now becomes a duty," says Dr Eve.
"There are also increasingly more and more women needing IVF, so going through the process shatters and changes your sexual interest, libido and functioning, so we that buildup that disrupts sexual functioning for both men and women."
PODCAST | Consexual with Dr Eve: Weak erections and dissatisfaction, how to treat erectile dysfunction
Once conception is achieved, pregnancy comes, and every woman responds differently. In the first and second trimesters, many women are very engorged and ripe vaginally, which means there is a great interest in being sexual. In the third trimester, they may still be interested in being sexual, but it's a little more challenging to be able to mobilise oneself physically to be able to be sexual.
Dr Eve says these differing circumstances and other changes will impact what happens once the baby is born on a psychological and mental well-being level.
"There is a lot of talk on social media about choosing your birthing experience, yet it doesn't happen like that for most people. There are going to be surprises along the way. There is a psychological disruption that happens, and that could be traumatic for the woman and will affect her sexual responses," says Dr Eve.
Regardless of the challenges, she encourages people to remain intimate, even if it does not include vaginal penetration.
"Hold on to that part of yourself that is a lover, even if it is just being in bed together, touching your toes with each other or being able to talk to each other romantically," says Dr Eve.
In the podcast, the sexologist also speaks about how long you should wait after giving birth, how to be intimate, and how to include sex toys in your sex life to help you continue to feel like a sexual being besides being a new parent.
PODCAST | Consexual with Dr Eve: Is sexting cheating?
Listen to the podcast below for more:
