Sex... and garlic breath

I am not talking about those "oh God, I am horribly fat, no one can see me naked!" spaces... great tracts have already been written about that – see here, here and here.

No, this is the sex and dodgy breath piece. Be it because you’ve eaten a little too much garlic for lunch, chosen the salad with the raw red onions or just decided to devour an entire packet of that scrumptious Woolies snapstick biltong. Or – and I know this is a long shot – you may have had a few glasses of Chardonnay (and perhaps a few associated Stuyvesants) that your lover wouldn’t be too keen to re-experience.

What to do, what to do?

Yip, we’re asking that random, not-often-asked-question – how can one still get laid, despite having dodgy breath and nary a toothbrush in sight?

The silliest minds at Women24 have got together to come up with the following options.

Doggy-style. It’s easy, they love it... and as long as you don’t laugh out loud too much, he may be none the wiser. Try this position if you’re bendy, this position if you’re not... and this position if you’re feeling silly.

Chewing gum. Just do it.

Negotiation. While many men don’t want to shag a dodgy-breathed chick... many, if they love you, will be open to compromise. Offer to try something you’ve always blushed at before. Like this. Or <gasp>, even this.

Blow jobs. Yes, we did save the most obvious for last. Get seriously good at these techniques, and no one will care if you smell the back of a Eskom-challenged fridge.

I know it’s silly, but somehow... inspiring. Do you, lovely Women24 readers, have more tips to add?

Let us know in the box below.