Recent studies in Australia have shown that a mere 20 percent of its women feel confident and happy with their bodies.
However, as many as 89 percent allowed poor body image to have an impact on their life in negative ways at times, including cancelling social engagements, job interviews or other plans.
Although we have no figures for South Africa, it seems possible that women in this country feel the same way.
“If we are at war with our body, we suffer a deep sense of alienation and disconnection from ourselves and others,” says soul-centred psychotherapy and eating psychology specialist Jodie Gale. “This then has an impact on all relationships and areas of our lives.”
Body confidence can be elusive and difficult for many people because they are searching in all the wrong places, she adds.
“Women are dieting, ‘clean’ eating, or engaging in excessive exercise or plastic surgery,” says Gale. “However, the search for body confidence is an inward journey, not an external one. It’s about having a good relationship between body, feelings, mind and soul.”
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Here are eight ways to begin your journey to body love, today.
1. Befriend your body
Start treating your body as you would a close friend.
“We think by tyrannising ourselves that it will lead to weight change and body confidence,” says Gale. “But that’s not true – it just makes us feel worse about ourselves. Befriending our body is the only way to find greater peace with it.”
“As with all relationships, building one with your body is a journey, and it will take time, so be gentle with yourself,” says Gale.
“Change the inner conversations you have with yourself, particularly those words that are harsh and self-critical. Speak to your body with kind words and listen to what it has to say. Nourish it with wholesome, pleasurable food and move it in ways that it loves.”
2. Throw out three items of clothing that don’t fit
Do you hold onto jeans that don’t fit, “just in case” you lose weight? Or are all your shirts a bit too tight, because you want to stick to a certain clothing size? It’s time to do a wardrobe clear out, says Sarah Harry, body image specialist and yoga teacher.
“Get rid of any items of clothing that don’t fit you and that are making you feel bad about your body! While you’re at it, make sure your underwear fits well too. Simple changes can make us feel more comfortable in our bodies right away.”
3. Practise mindfulness for more body awareness
Mindfulness is the practice of focusing on the present moment and concentrating on what’s going on around you.
“It allows us to be curious, non-judgemental, and welcoming about our thoughts and feelings towards our bodies,” says Harry.
“You can start to live more in the moment and connect more to your body in a positive way with a simple five minutes a day. Apps such as Smiling Mind, Stop Breathe & Think, and Headspace are great but even just listening to your own breath and paying attention to it for a few moments is being mindful. Don’t make the goals too high – start with a few minutes!”
6. Create your own positive body culture
Go on a mission to create your own positive body movement. “Look at your social media and unfollow or unlike anyone who is sending you messages that your appearance is your worth,” says Adams.
“For every unfollow, follow someone who is truly body positive!
“Other ways to embrace your body include not talking about it negatively, thanking people who compliment you, finding non-appearance things about yourself that you like, refusing to weigh yourself (unless you need to for health purposes), and thanking your body often for being your home and your safe place!” she says.
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7. Write a body timeline
You might not have experienced consistently positive messages about your body throughout your life. Reach for a pen and paper and document your own body journey to pinpoint where your confidence has been challenged.
“Write all the messages you were given about your body,” says Adams. “Start from childhood. When did you begin to believe that something was wrong with your body? What sorts of things did you hear about your own or other people’s bodies growing up?
“The point of this exercise is to recognise you were not born disliking your body - it was something you were taught,” she adds. “It is so powerful to learn this. Once you’ve written it all down, think - is this the type of thing I’d want my children to learn? And if not, rebel! A major part of body image work is to start getting angry at the diet culture messages that may have brainwashed you.”
8. Practise joyful movement
“Many people use exercise to punish their bodies – ploughing away on the treadmill at the gym, for example–and they find themselves not having much fun,” says Harry.
“Instead of joyless training, find a movement you love–anything from hula dancing to roller skating, martial arts, swimming, or walking. Joyful movement starts to connect back to your body in a simple and embodied way,” she says.
“I use yoga to help people become more comfy in their skin, but you can choose any joyful movement you like. The sky’s the limit!”
